


The House of the Rising Sun

by Sidney Pierced (sidneypierced)



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Bellamy Blake - Freeform, Crime Scenes, Cult, Detective Lexa, Eventual Smut, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Minor Monty Green/Nathan Miller, New Orleans, Police Uniforms, bar owner raven, idk - Freeform, octavia blake - Freeform, officer octavia, raven reyes - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-12
Updated: 2016-10-23
Packaged: 2018-07-14 16:00:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 20,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7178711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sidneypierced/pseuds/Sidney%20Pierced
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Bellamy gets a family home in New Orleans, he and Clarke decide to start a new life there. When they get to the house they find out it's more than they bargain for. When they call Octavia for help she brings with her a hot shot detective recently transferred from New York, Lexa Woods and Clarke thinks her adjustment to the new situation will be a bittersweet process.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fortune Favours the Brave

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: I liked pre murderous access Bellamy, season 2 bellamy that is. I think he and Clarke worked well as two leaders with different point of views NOT as a couple that's why I made them a couple here. You'll see Clarke being sweet with him but not too sweet. They are married best friends. This is a Clexa crime story. I hope y'all enjoy it.

“Fortune favours the brave.”

That’s what her dad kept saying to her while growing up, so it didn’t come as a surprise to Abby when Clarke decided to tattoo it in the year aniversary of her father’s death. The tattoo in her forearm was her talisman, she rubbed it everytime she had to face a dealema or she had a hard choice to make.  
She almost rubbed it raw when she finally decided to accept Bellamy’s proposal. She wasn’t sure if she really wanted it, Bellamy was a great guy but it requires a giant leap to go from having good boyfriend to be bound to him forever.

  
“Who lives forever anyway?” Freddie Mercury’s whisper at the end of Who Wants to Live Forever haunted her until she put the boy out of his misery and said “yes”.  
She would be lying if she hadn’t been looking for clues that she made the right decision ever since. Sometimes she took as a sign of fate a certain song, a certain strike of luck, a certain happy coincidence. Clarke got giddy after throwing the dice and getting a certain number. “Make it five and it’s meant to be.”  
The decision she had at hand now was quite easy, but that didn’t stop her from rubbing that tattoo yet again.

  
Destiny had apparently decided it was time for her and Bellamy to move to New Orleans. She had half heartedly applyed for a vacancy at an art gallery just to see if it really was meant to be. She got a call 5 minutes after sending her resumé. They must be desperate, she thought.

  
(The truth is that Clarke was everything they ever needed and more. Her experience at Sotheby’s made her a prestigious art expert that any gallery or museum would grovel to have her working for them. Clarke didn’t see it that way, she just thought she had a good eye.)

  
Bellamy was heir to an house in New Orleans. The Blakes were old Money and Clarke always new it but if you looked at Bell or Octavia you would never know it. They were just like any other of their college friends.

  
Octavia’s authority fixation had made her take the police academy and she was now a cop in New Orleans. She left Washington at eighteen claiming to not be able to stand not even another month of cold weather. If they had any chance of her coming back, it was shattered when she met her beau Lincoln.  
Clarke wasn’t very fond of the idea of moving cross country but to be honest it was where she could live rent free. Bellamy was an architect, he could pretty much work anywhere. He got a job at a company that turned some old houses into more sustainable and environment friendly homes. He was pretty excited about it and so was Clarke.  
It was just that nagging feeling she had, that there’s more to this life. There’s some spark missing. Maybe a change would be good, maybe it’s exactly what they need. They’ve been together for two years, they have a golden retriever named Python, they can have their own home. She’ll continue to do what she loves, he’ll be doing something he loves for a change. What could go wrong?

 

* * *

 

 

Clarke learned the hard way that a lot could go wrong indeed. It started with the trip down south. They didn’t even leave the state before a flat tire (and the absence of the replacement that Bellamy forgot to get the last time he had a flat) delayed their journey for a day, they learned never to start a massive trip on a Sunday because you have to wait til Monday to get your car fixed if anything happens.

  
Somewhere in colorado, Python starts to feel badly thanks to the heat wave that took place precisely in their travel week. Live and learn, right? Check the weather before road trippin’ should be obvious but not to them.

  
When they were finally arriving to the address, they found out Bellamy’s aunt’s house needed a little bit of work. The house description had said well conserved, ready to inhabit….but was probably written in the seventies. The place was a mess and the roof was missing from one of the rooms.  
All Clarke wanted to do was cry and she almost did. She and Bellamy exchanged worried looks.

  
“Clarke, I’m sorry I obviously didn’t know.”

  
“Yeah, it’s not your fault Bells” She said sighing taking another look at the place. Python was already inside wagging his tail. “At least someone is happy.”  
She feels Bellamy hug her from behind and she begins to relax.

  
“We’ll make it our home, I promise.”

  
She turns to look into his kind eyes, his shaggy hair and she wants to believe it, she really wants.  
“Do I even want a home?” she thinks and flinches at her ever present doubt that her life is taking the right course. She wonders if Bellamy saw it but he is staring at something behind her.

  
“OI Python, drop that. NOW. I said NOW GODDAMN IT.” He lets go of her embrace and runs to the dog who drops something on the floor. Is that? Is that a fibula??

  
“That’s a fibula” She says getting closer, being the daughter of a doctor has it’s anatomical perks.

  
“Ah what?” Bellamy says chasing Python who is enjoying this catch game a lot more now that he found out his owner was playing as well.

  
“A bone, from someone’s lower leg.”

 

“Don’t be silly, why would there be ---“ He stops on his tracks and looks back at the house. “Should I call O?”

  
Clarke takes a step inside and gets overwellmed by the foul smell. Yeah, they need Octavia here.

 

* * *

 

Octavia said she would take 20 minutes to get to the house but an hour later there’s no one to be seen. They are sitting in the car heat, listening to the radio silently. They didn’t dare to go inside before Octavia gets there, Bellamy is pale and that was something she thought he could never get. She always liked his tanned skin, that and his marvellous teeth were his best features. Now he is scared, sweaty and pale. A shadow of who he usually is. She must look awful to. She is also sweaty, her hair matted to her forehead, she had to run after Py and get him on the car without the bone

  
She doesn’t know how much longer they wait, she doesn’t even see the cop car pull just in front of theirs…of their house. She swallows and prepares to face the sun again, she sees Octavia leave the car and closing the door. Clarke motions to do the same and then realises there’s someone else.  
“Clarke!” Octavia comes to greet her with a hug. “it’s been so long”

  
“Yes! But we are finally here. We could have gotten a better welcome though. “ Clarke is finally feeling relieved, she can’t help feeling like the cavalry is finally here.

  
“I should have stopped by sooner to check how the house was, I’d find this out first I’m sorry. But we are remodeling our home, as you know, and it’s been a mess with the long shifts and the house Works.”

  
“Don’t worry about it, we’ll figure this out.” Clarke finally starts feeling like her normal self when they her someone clearing their throat.

  
“Oh Clarke, I’m sorry. This is Detective Woods, she’s the reason I took so long.” Octavia says rolling her eyes.

  
“I’m sorry, Mrs Blake.” Detective Woods walks to them and extends her hand. She’s stiff and in a suit. With this heat. She has sunglasses that she takes suddenly as if realising it’s rude to present herself with her eyes covered. It takes a little for Clarke to shake her hand not because she didn’t realise that’s what was happening but because those were the loveliest green eyes she has ever seen. She always had a weakness for green eyes. As soon as they shook hands, Woods puts the sunglasses on and her voice is collected when she says. “Octavia had to wait, I had a mass to attend.”

  
“I never knew hot shot detectives from big north cities paused their investigations for a mass. And they say we’re religious in the South.” Octavia snarks and Clarke can see Woods face transform, she wants to say something to Octavia but it’s as if she decides unleashing her fury could change anything so she keeps still. She was probably counting to ten mentally. Choosing to ignore the comment, Woods went straight to the point.

  
“Tell me exactly what happened when you arrived on location.”

  
Clarke begin to tell them about the ride to the south and Octavia kept telling her to speed up to the point where they got to the house. Woods listened and scribbled a few notes on her pad. Octavia hugs Bellamy but leaves him be since he can’t stop vomiting leaning against the car. They’ll leave the pleasantries for later then.

  
Clarke does have to stop herself from staring at her hand while she is telling her story, Octavia is observing the grounds and dared to go into the house. Those are really long hands and elegante ones too. They look like the marble hands of statues she spent so many times sketching in university. They had a ring on it, so she guessed Detective Woods was married as well, good thing. Great thing. She was talking about how she chased Python to someone’s yard to get the bone and she saw the smile form on Woods full lips, that’s a wonderful mouth too. And there was of course her hair, that fantastical hair that sometimes moved with a breeze and made it look as if they were shooting a music vídeo. Woods was really beautiful, Clarke thought. So beautiful it almost made her day better. She blamed the aesthetic in her. Beautiful she thought like a work of art, she mused and realised she stopped talking and they were just awkwardly staring at each other. A married work of art.

  
“Ma’am, you REALLY need to see this.” Octavia says coming to the door to call Woods, with a handkerchief.

  
“For the love of God, I told you a hundred times to call me Lexa!” Woods says not taking her eyes of Clarke in exasperation. “Will you be okay, Mrs Blake?” She feels Lexa’s hand on her shoulder and suddenly the heat seems to come from inside out not from the Louisiana sun. Clarke licks her lips and takes a deep breathe before answering.

  
“Yeah sure, just find out who died in my future home.”

  
Woods gives her shoulder a little squeeze and turns to enter the house. Clarke leans against the car not bothering with the scalding metal against her. Damn she hates to watch Lexa go into that house but is she is easy to watch leave. It’s like the heat doesn’t even phase her, like the dead person inside doesn’t phase her. As if Clarke doesn’t phase her. So composed, so collected.

  
It’s been a while since Clarke got reminded that being bisexual meant that she also liked girls, girls like Lexa however must be everybody’s type.  
Lexa came out of the house straight to her, striding, looking like a model in a high price suit. She almost expected Lexa to give her a twirl when she got to her. She took the sunglasses off again. Clarke swallowed at the sight of them again. Damn.

  
“Mrs Bl—“ Lexa stopped has Clarke raised her eyebrows at the name “Clarke. It’s not a single person, it’s a group of four. By the disposition, it appears as they were gathered to do some kind of ritualistic meeting. It’s really nasty. I need to seal this area, Octavia is already reporting this and asking for more manpower. These people were murdered. I’m going to need that bone for the forensics.” Lexa pointed to the back seat of her car as she saw Python chewing happily a femur. How the hell did that get there, Clarke thought.

“I’m sorry if Python is chewing your evidence.” Lexa seems to find Clarke’s appology endearing because she gives her a real smile, one that Clarke feels she doesn’t give very easily.

  
“Don’t worry about it, I’ll arrest that villain for obstruction of justice, Ma’am.” Lexa said before turning serious again. “You need to find yourselves a place to stay, this –“ she motions to the house. “is going to take a while.”

  
Almost made of marble, Clarke thinks taking in Lexa’s figure as if she’s thirsty and has finally found a glass of water. She hears Bellamy churning in the back and sighs.

  
“Are you okay back there?”

  
“Swell” he answers with his thumb over the hood of the car.

  
“Yeah, we’ll figure something out.” Clarke turns to Lexa again and she is giving her a card.

  
“If you need anything, emphasis on anything, give me a call or stop by the precinct. Octavia can give you the address as well.” She takes Lexa’s card and she feels Lexa’s hand fall on her forearm as if to reassure her. It looks strange but’s it’s as if Lexa wants to take her hand and it’s too polite for it so she rubs her thumb exactly where Clarke has the tattoo. Lexa’s eyes are on her own, she hasn’t even notice the tattoo so this could be what she would describe as a sign.

  
She can only say a quiet thanks to Lexa as her phone begins to ring and Lexa pulls away and Clarke releases a breathe she didn’t know she was holding.

  
What could go wrong? How about a million different things.


	2. A Stillness of Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A summary of Lexa's life previously to the Rising Sun crime scene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, hello  
> I had hitchy fingers until I wrote Lexa's side. Enjoy. Say what you think of it, thank you in advance for your time.  
> TW: depression, mentions of attempted suicide.  
> PS: this is mildly inspired by one of my favorite films, A Single Man.

"Just get through the goddamn day!" It's been the first words in her mind every morning for the past four years. 

Everyday was the same. If she managed to go through the day without crying she would consider it a good day. If she managed to smile at something someone said, it was a great day. If she managed to see beauty at all, in a flower or a dog or a building or the normal day to day life of people was fantastic. That usually happened once a month. 

She was a lot better, it's not as if she was as depressed as in the beginning. On the year following Costia's death she was a human wreck, food didn't have taste, life wasn't worth living. She scared her friends and family, she tried it to end it for more than once. She just wanted the misery to stop. Then with counselling and her hard work trying to get her routines back on she turned the table on depression. But it never goes away really, just something that gets knocked out of your sight and when you are feeling low it's right there on the edge of your sanity waiting to pounce like a lioness hunting.

The lioness has been without pouncing for two full years but this year it's going to be harder to drive her back to the darkness. 

This is the day. She can stop herself from thinking about Costia and the tragic way she died most of the year except on her birthday.

Last year she was obsessed with her final exams to become a detective, if there's something who can bring Lexa out of a root is work. She needs that sense of purpose to keep going but now, work is failing her on the most infernal of days.

Things have been going all backwards since she was transferred to New Orleans. Lexa knows she's not the most approachable person but everyone here thinks she's out to get them. The fact that she wears a suit to work probably doesn't help, she knows. She can't lose it just yet, it's her armor. It's her physical poker face, besides she looks amazing in it she knows. At least she stopped wearing the one she got married in. That she knows was tacky but it was a time where she would take all the opportunities of closure she could get and if it required being tacky she deal with it.

There was this officer,though, that she got paired with and she positively hates Lexa. Octavia scares Lexa. She wouldn't be surprised if she stopped the cop car in the middle of nowhere, pulled the trigger and dragged Lexa's corpse into a lake. She has this fierceness into her eyes, like she always has a pit of fury burning inside her. Or maybe it's just the absurd amount of leather she wears. Either way, dealing with her today will be complicated to say the least. Usually Lexa would just go with the less is more when it comes to words, but Octavia was always trying to find out what made her tick. 

On one particularly mean day, she said, she hated how composed Lexa was all the time. If she only know how weak is the glue that binds Lexa's broken pieces together. 

But she has the mass to attend and she needs to get ready soon. She was never very religious but Costia was. She stopped believing in anything all together when Costia passed away. 

It's not to pray that she comes to this, she just wants to feel closer to Costia one more time, sometimes it works. Sometimes it just reminds her of the void she has inside. Today was the latter.

It's with relief that she leaves the church, stepping into the sunlight putting her raybans in a swift move.

"If my boyfriend looks half as good as you coming down the stairs at our wedding, I'll be over the moon." Octavia is already there, reclining against the car with her uniform perfectly ironed. Lexa can't tell if she's mocking her or not but she won't hide she's surprised she's there. They agreed they would meet at the precinct once this was finished.

"I didn't take you for a stalker, Octavia. I don't remember the police authorizing cop cars on uber."

"I took the liberty of cancelling it." Octavia passed her a cup of coffee, black no cream just like Lexa drinks it and by now this is little gesture of kindness sounds terribly suspicious. She raises her eyebrow has she takes the cup from Octavia's hand. "My brother's in town and there's something funky at his house."

"That still doesn't justify ---"

"There's something dead inside his house." She huffs exasperated.

"Oh, human? did he just move in?" Octavia rolled her eyes to the back of her head. That must have hurt.

"He arrived half an hour ago." She said quietly now, she's trying to hide that's she's actually nervous about this. Time to be the bigger person here, Lexa.

"We'll figure it out, don't worry."

"I'm not worried." Octavia snarks but her hands get white at the knuckles.  
\----

When they get to a house, Lexa takes a little bit of time getting out of the car just to get a hold of the surroundings. The house is a ruin, Lexa doesn't feel like it's livable but to each it's own.

She turns around and she notices Octavia hugging a blonde girl, that must be her brother's significant other. Lexa stands there awkwardly, not only is she not confortable with public displays of affection but since Octavia clearly doesn't like her she doesn't feel like intruding her private moment.

She has to step in when Octavia blames her for her delay. She apologizes to Mrs Blake, not managing to ignore how attractive she was. How light, easy going, like a warm breeze on a summer night. She didn't remember having such thoughts over someone in a long time so this must be a good day.

As soon as she saw fit, Lexa skipped the chitchat and asked what happened. She could see an adorable golden retriever in the back of the car and she heard Clarke's story. 

They arrived, got amazed at the state of the house, noticed the dog had something in his mouth, that something was a human bone and that the house smelled like death. At this point they called Officer Blake and got into the car to wait for them.

Octavia was already searching the premises, she might be rough around the edges but Lexa can handle it because she's so professional. She wishes one day she'll win Octavia's friendship but know she'll have to accept only her hate. Baby steps, she could hear Anya's voice in the back of her head.

She turns to walk to the house and finds this weird feeling coming over her, as if she is being watched, she manages to look back ever so slightly as she crosses the house threshold but sees nothing odd. Except maybe the fact that Clarke is so obviously checking out her ass but that only brings a blush to her cheeks, that's certainly different.

The house is a mess even bigger on the inside and she founds the bodies in the living room. They looked bitten and scratched as if attacked by a wild animal but their hands are connected. As if they wanted this and stayed together through the attack until the last one took their final breathe. It looked like those cults where people commit mass suicide except that this people were obviously murdered by someone...or something. 

She started going through the protocol as she moved out of the house. Clarke was still there, leaning against the car in that ridiculous tank top and ridiculous shorts that showed of her ridiculous legs. Lexa did her best to ignore the part of her brain rejoicing that some parts of her were kind of melting and not because of the heat.  
She explains to Clarke that she has to seal the place, take the dog's bone up to the lab, explained the procedures all this without looking down to...nevermind that, she has looked at the cleavage as well. There goes her composure.

She hears someone vomiting on the other side of the car and she realizes Octavia's brother was there and he was married to this person in front of her. That's when she decided that she needed to behave and be compassionate not horny.

She takes her card from her blazer's pocket, she's had it there since forever waiting for the moment to pull the movie moment and give someone her card. She didn't expect it would be an attractive blonde married to officer Blake's brother.

Instinctively Lexa does something unimaginable, unpredictable. She touches Clarke, slides her hand down her arm and stops just a little bit short of her hand because she caughts herself doing it. What was she thinking? Did she want to hold Clarke's hand?

Probably, she missed holding hands in general. Clarke is smiling to her, she looks a little emotional as if she has tears forming in her eyes. Probably so stressed out, it's an awful thing to happen to someone so full of light. 

They stand there awkwardly until her own phone goes off. It's Anya, she excuses herself to answer and for the first time in what seems to be forever on this day, she tells her about Clarke and her murder scene instead of the past.


	3. Late Night Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke uses her card.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a very small chapter but it was made with love.

Lexa spent the next day trying to find out what cult were those people in. She found later that the symbol she found on the floor belonged to a recent cult found on the outskirts of new orleans called The Rising Sun.

It was a sun with a spiral in the middle, she found it incredibly creepy but then she wasn't the best person to get someone's religious beliefs. She got herself a team of investigators, Indra was the best but she wasn't the most sociable person either. For Lexa it made no difference but she did see the look on Finn's face when he got paired with her. Tough luck.

Then she got Gustus and Harper, Ontari and Roan and that's all the man power she needed. She stayed with Octavia as a matter of justice although she would probably enjoy it more if she was with Indra, everybody knows she's a fangirl.

They planned their approach of the investigation and the other three groups would start asking questions over town. Octavia and her were scheduled to visit The Oasis, the rising sun so called refuge, where they would be expecting them at 10 am.

When she got home, she couldn't turn her head off of work so she continued to search online about the cult. She was about page 5 on the google top hits when her phone starts to ring. At first she doesn't even register it, nobody calls her after 9pm except Anya and she was on a date. It was on that train of thought that she decided to answer the phone, since it was probably Anya asking for a way out of the date.

It was with surprise that she read the number on the screen and didn't recognize it. She had a few prank calls since she moved so she figured it was probably that, but the person was insisting so she tried her luck.

"Hello!" She answered fully demonstrating her annoyance.

"Sorry, I hope I didn't wake you up. Did I? Oh God, this was a bad idea." The voice on the other side was familiar but she wasn't really recognizing it.

"Excuse me, who is this?"

"Clarke, it's..hum..Clarke. You gave me your card. You know today, from the house...with the dead --" Clarke would have kept going if she didn't stop her.

"Oh of course, Clarke. Hi. This is Lexa obviously..." So stupid. " Humm, are you ok? Is there something wrong?"

"No, I just...I just can't sleep. I'm actually walking Python and we are staying at O's and I don't want to bother anyone, and since you gave me your card, i wondered if...I don't know. I think I needed to talk to someone...Bellamy is still a little off since last night and O's all excited about the case and Lincoln is a sweetheart but he's doing night shift, he's a doctor... So I thought maybe, you could, we could, I'm new in town and I don't have many friends..."

"Of course, I'll get you and we'll go somewhere." Not that she knew where to take an attractive girl to vent on a friday night. She might have known one day but it seemed a lifetime away. Besides the only New Orleans she knew was related to her job so not exactly the brightest places to take Clarke.

"It's okay if I'm interrupting something, I just. I just felt like talking to you, for some reason." Like the fact that the tattoo in her forearm felt like it was on fire since she met Lexa.

"No it would actually be good to me, can you believe I moved in and still didn't go to a jazz bar, in the goddamn mother city of jazz?" Lexa said and heard Clarke chuckle on the other side, as if she was finally easing up.

"Well, we can't let that go on for even another day. Specially since I know just the place!" She mentally thanked that she knew Raven, even if she hasn't made contact yet since arriving town. She hadn't exactly had the best of days.

"Really, didn't you like, move in yesterday?" 

"A great friend from college decided to open a bar down here as a second job. We'll go to Nevermore, have you heard of it?"

"Of course, it's only the hippest bar in town over the last two years. But I thought it was invitation only on fridays and saturdays." She had been annoying Anya to take her there, saying it was the only place leaving netflix for but their schedules had been to incompatible so far.

"Don't worry, I've got a few favors to collect with raven. I'll use all the cards in my hand." Clarke was suddenly excited and it made Lexa almost excited as well.

"Great, shall I pick you up?" It's only fair, at least that she can navigate better than Clarke, she knows the city like the back of her hand by now. She spent her first month trying to memorize every single street in this place.

"Yes, please, it would be very chivalrous of you."

"I'm a gentlewoman, that's the first thing you need to know about me." Were they flirting? It sounded like it but it couldn't be because Lexa didn't know how. She had the worst pick up lines ever and Clarke.. well, Clarke was married.

 

"Oh I got that much already, let's just see if you can dance as well. Meet me in half an hour? I'll text you O's address." Funny, it sounded almost like they knew each other for the longest time, at least, Clarke was feeling like that.

"I'll be there."

And just like that Lexa was going to stop being an eremit... for now. Old habits die hard. She was going to look at her closet and wondered if she should go on the suit as well but it felt tackier than usual. She decided she wasn't wearing her armor today. Just jeans, a band t shirt and converse will do. She will take a blazer, she's better but she's not reborn. Clarke could see the real Lexa and if she didn't like it well, that's her problem. It wasn't as if she owed her anything but to solve her murder case. 

She wouldn't deny that she was nervous, she was leaving the house, leaving her safe place to go meet a girl she barely knew. But she refused to worry about it, Clarke needed her and that was enough for now.


	4. Denial is not just a river in Egypt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa and Clarke visit Nevermore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're back!  
> Thanks for sticking around, my darlings, this chapter is all fluff and no corpse. We'll get to that in the next one.

Lexa was to naive too think she would stop feeling so nervous about the whole meeting. She was calling it meeting while a voice in the back of her head was whispering "date" everytime as if it was correcting her.

She was greeted by Octavia who looked a lot less scary without her uniform and she managed to sit and talk to Bellamy while she waited for Clarke to get ready. She wondered if he would be so chilled about the whole meeting date if he knew she was gayer than a rainbow. Of course it did help that she was still wearing her wedding ring, she was twirling it in her fingers now, as she always does when nervous, and she caught him looking at it more than once. He still looks a little sick and whiny but he was trying to be pleasant and they chatted a little about his future job. She could tell he thanked her for not bringing his house of corpses and taking his mind of it focusing on his job. Lexa was good at keeping small talk, years of going to her parents socials made her an expert of keeping people entertained without giving anything about her away.

She was more than grateful to hear Clarke's footsteps coming down behind her and also about the way she called her. When Clarke said her name made it sound like an audible ray of sunshine, as if she was never happier to see someone. Lexa was good at reading people, she got that she loved making people feel comfortable and happy. She was definitely a people's pleaser unlike Lexa but by God was Lexa pleased. She felt her breathe catch a little when Clarke gave her a peck in the cheek, being flooded by Clarke's floral perfume, sweet and warm but not so sweet it would make your stomach turn. It was charming and balanced, like Clarke. Or at least like the perception she had of Clarke, if there's one thing Lexa knew, and was the total embodiment of it, is that looks could be deceiving.

They said their goodbyes and Lexa promised to bring Clarke safe, sound and at a decent hour. She caught something on Octavia's eyes that resembled suspicion when she looked from one to the other but she couldn't really confront her over something she couldn't exactly pinpoint but at least Octavia wasn't glaring at her like she did every morning before her second coffee. If Lexa didn't know better she'd say O's warming up on her.

It wasn't until they were inside the car that it truly dawn on her, that she was alone, with a stranger. A beautiful one, that smelt like summer and was wearing the most adorable dress and had her beautiful golden hair braided like some greek demigod strolling through the woods. She got the car started and the hands on the wheel were sweaty. She tried her best to start small talk, she was good at that right?

"So Clarke, how was your day?" She glanced with the corner of her eye and Clarke seemed to be struggling over something.

"Was it okay that i kissed your cheek?" Is that what Clarke was worrying about?

"I didn't give it much thought, you seem like one of those touch people, you know? That touch people while talking and so? What's the word? I don't remember it now, but you feel like a warm person Clarke. So it didn't look funny even if I usually keep my distance to people, it didn't actually feel like an invasion you know?" She was not being very clear but she was sweaty and she didn't really know how to explain the unexplainable. She was not one for public displays of affection but Clarke clearly was and cheering up Clarke seemed like the right thing to do.

"I am. I blame the artist in me. It's just...Oh god...I can't believe I'm saying this but I just can't bear it. It's not fair that I know so much more about you than you know about me." Clarke was fidgeting on her seat and Lexa's curiosity peaked. They were already parking nearby the bar. She killed the engine and waited patiently.

"What..what do you mean, know more about me than I know about you?"

"I swear to God and also Jesus..." Clarke struggled for the words.

"I thought that only applied when you were thanking someone." Lexa let a throating laugh out and Clarke stopped fidgeting and smiled at her. Lexa thought it illuminated the whole car, it was almost annoying that someone could have such a good vibe.

"Well, the thing is that Octavia told me about...about your wife." Clarke said every word pausing, as if to softened the information and the smile turned to a frown and Lexa didn't like that.

"Oh" Lexa didn't really know how to react, she knew everyone knew but it was actually the first time anyone acknowleged that they knew so bluntly in her face. She managed to sigh as if to take the sudden weight that descended upon her chest.

"I'm really sorry, Lexa. I do know how it is to lose someone you care so deeply about. I just want to know if there's something I can do to help." Lexa was going to dismiss it arrogantly as she had done to Anya everytime she said that, but something on the clarity of Clarke stopped her. She paused as if to put the feeling it words. Since she couldn't, she left the car and opened Clarke's door. She held out a hand to help Clarke out and when they were standing up she felt a wierd tug in her heart. One she hadn't felt in years and one that she would not pay attention to it. She'd keep it bottled up both for the inappropriate nature of it and because she couldn't deal with it as if she would physically explode over it.

"Just...Just help me get my mind off of it." She finally said it looking down to the floor as she clicked to lock her car.

"Oh baby, now that I'm an expert on! Do you know what they used to call me in college? Frat boy Clarke? I still got that party animal in me, I swear!" Clarke's mood perked up and it was a sight for sore eyes.

"I'm a bit rusty for beer pongs but eh haven't had shots in forever-" She felt Clarke take her arm and Lexa could see for the first time that Clarke had a phrase tattooed on her forearm. She found her small talk subject.

"So that tattoo? what does it mean?"

Nevermore was just as incredible as they praised it. The beer was good, the food was good and damn, was the music good.  
They managed a good table where they could see the concert but still manage to talk.  
Clarke told the story of her tattoo and then conversation flowed easily, she and Lexa had a lot of subjects to discuss apparently and she could see Lexa relaxing bit by bit at each topic. She watched as Lexa first felt comfortable enough to take her blazer off, what a extra she was, it took her twenty minutes to take it off even if it was hot as hell inside the restaurant. Then after the first beer Clarke noticed she relaxed on the stick up posture Octavia always used to describe her. When the nachos came to the table, Lexa's smile was wider, easier and her shoulders were low and resting against the back of the chair. Lexa managed to make a very wonderful braid out of her curly hair, it was impossible for her to manage the heat otherwise. By the end of the concert, and her third beer she had a tinge of red on her cheeks and was giggling at every silly thing Clarke said. Clarke was feeling very silly herself but she was a bit addicted on the sound of Lexa's laugh.

This isn't a date, but it could be. She thought while Lexa told a funny story about a case in New York. In another life, she would have met Lexa on a social occasion in the village and not when she found her future house full of dead people. In another life she had lexa would hit off just like this and they would leave the restaurant together. In another life she would steal a kiss, or three before getting home and making Lexa promise to not wait too long to ask her for a second date soon. In another life she might even make a move right here, like just fake a careless touch on Lexa's thighs while they were talking. What would be the harm anyways, she is married and Lexa...Lexa is grieving. She doesn't know if it's the easy going feel between them, as if they know each other for the longest time or if it's the beer or maybe simply the fact that Lexa is breathtakingly beautiful that makes her  
feel almost an hunger to touch Lexa. She entertains on the pros and cons of laying a hand on Lexa's thigh when they get interrupted.

"I'll be damned! I thought I had one too many because it was just not possible!? LEXA? OUTSIDE? On a friday night and without a suit on a bar???" A tall pretty mean looking girl was staring at them dumbfounded, there was another girl right behind her. On a closer look Clarke saw that the girl was talking to someone who was congratulating her and it looked like...

"RAVEN!!!!!!" Clarke went to say hello leaving Lexa and the stranger alone. "I thought you were busy!"

"Clarke, honey, you look so good." They hugged each other and they chatted for a bit. Raven explained she'd been on a date but her date, Anya, apparently insisted on stopping by the bar to see with her own eyes that her best friend finally left the house. "Of course I should have known that if someone manages to get a dead man walking again it would be The Griffin. I thought you were married to..."

"I am, this is not a date for christ sake. Me and Bellamy just moved in and well, long story short, I needed someone to talk to and to vent and Lexa was kind enough to take me out."

"Ew I forgot you married Bellamy, you could always do so much better. Remember Nyilah of the 7 orgasms--" Raven said the last part loud enough so the others could hear, although Clarke was not sure it was meant to embarrass her or to make Anya laugh behind her. Either way, Raven managed both and that earned a sympathetic look from Lexa

"--- shhhn Raven"

"well, i always thought you should have married that one. ANYWAYS, can we sit at your table, apparently those two are inseparable and I want to impress the bff. This one is a keeper Clarke and you are going to help me win her over."

"Me? Are you sure you want me to start charming Anya with your mechanics gone wild tales from college?" Ah revenge is a dish better served cold. She got a throaty laugh from Lexa and it was worth the pain from ravens foot over hers.

"Seems we got ourselves a rather entertaining duo Anya" Lexa said while the pair went to get everybody drinks.

"And damn, Lexa, aren't they gorgeous?" Anya said looking down to Clarke's hand and seeing the wedding ring. "Although you'd be the last person in life to settle with being the other woman Lexa, how did that happen?" Anya was genuinely surprised and if Lexa could she would dig a hole in the ground and bury herself in it.

"This isn't, aham, it isn't like that. I'm working at her case, you know the one of the cult? She's the owner of the house and she doesn't know anyone here and she asked me out, as friends. Just that. I know her husband for christ sake."

"You looked very into each other." Anya purred as she got comfortable looking from the corner of her eye and catching Lexa's conflicted expression seeing clarke and Raven laughing over something. "She is stunning, she looks like a good person - you know i can see crooks from a mile away -, she is kind and all soft around you. All I'm saying is that you should be careful Lex, you have barely healed."

"Nothing is happening ok? I like her, I like being around her. She's perfectly safe for me and I think I'm safe for her, she's confortable around me and that's the way it will stay. " She got upset and she didn't know why. She had no bad intention with Clarke and she wasn't stupid, she did not need Anya's concerns.

"You like her." Anya says as if she finally got the answer of a riddle.

"As a friend." Lexa said and tried to sound as robotic as possible.

"Like hell you do. You want her!" Lexa had to turn to Anya because she sounded almost cheerful.

"What?"

"You want her. Like physically want her. I've caught you staring at her boobs but I thought she had something out of place, god knows you are a little picky with stuff...but it's obvious.oh my, i did not expect that." Before Lexa could say anything, her blush gave her away. the girls were back and That tug she felt early only 5 times worse now that Clarke was sitting sinfully close to her to squeeze anyone on their table and resting her hand on her thigh carelessly and as if it was the most natural thing in the world. She looked up from it and saw Anya smirking at her lazily. She got a text in that very instant and when she looked to her screen she could see the notification from Anya's "Call me Cleopatra, I'm the queen of denial."

Lexa chose to put her phone away afraid Clarke might unententionally read it. she tried to pay attention to what was going on but she could feel the heat of Clarke's hand and right there she knew she was screwed.

somewhere along the night Anya decided to nominate herself the designated driver and everybody had too much fun.

They left Raven home first, Lexa and Clarke cheered as Raven stole a peck on Anya's lips. They had declared themselves shippers of Ranya, then Anya decided to leave Lexa home because it was closer if Clarke didn't mind spending a few more minutes in the car alone with her.

Lexa complained but not too much, she was tired and she was longing for her bed she just didn't want to leave Clarke alone when she felt responsible for her. It was stupid, she knew Anya since 5 there was no one more trust worthy than her. maybe she just didn't want to say goodbye at all but there really wasn't much she could do about it so better to rip the bandaid sooner than later. their eyes meet on the rearview mirror. She thinks Clarke has the prettiest eyes ever and she could swear Clarke blushes as she looks away.

When Anya stops in front of her house, Clarke says she'll accompany Lexa to the door since she is moving to the front seat anyways.  
It surprises Lexa but she doesn't say anything she just starts towards the porch with Clarke trailing beside her.

"I had a really nice evening, Lexa. " Clarke leans against the door frame while Lexa looks for her keys.

"Yeah, me too. And you got to see your friend." Lexa leans as well opening the lock but not the door.

"It was pretty amazing even before that." Clarke takes a step further and leans against the door. Lexa gets off the door and stands a little lost with her hands on her pockets and a raised eyebrow. "And you smell very good Lexa, for someone with such a gruesome job. I keep thinking how it will feel to...hug you, you think we could do that?" Clarke said sweetly and with a bit of sadness that wasn't there five minutes away.

"Of course" lexa said relief of course they could hug, she could do that. She was not prepared for the warmth of Clarke's body against her, how peaceful it felt. How good. She had a hard time letting go and when they did, they did it very slowly.  
Then Clarke reached her hands to Lexa's face and touched her cheek with the gentlest touch, tracing the outline of her every feature, ending with her thumb feeling the edges of Lexa's full lips.

"I know it's the alcohol talking but i really really wish I could kiss you right now." Clarke tore her eyes painfully from her lips onto lexa's eyes. The honesty of it made it impossible for lexa to move not even to freak out. "I wish i could suck all that sadness away from you, I wish I wasn't married and i could just..." Clarke stopped before she said something she couldn't deal with tomorrow but she needed to keep Lexa in her life, even if it's just for as a friend. "I want you...in my life. I promise I'll behave, I promise."

"Shhh. I'm not going anywhere Clarke. I mean I'm going to go now but i'll text you tomorrow okay?" As Clarke looked so unsure, Lexa did the only thing she thought ok to do (even if she wanted nothing more to kiss Clarke senseless against the door, she had too much self control to go through with it. it was both a blessing and a curse). She held one of clarke's hands and gave it a little squeeze kissing over each knuckle. "Go get some sleep Clarke, it's been a hard couple of days. Goodnight." Lexa planted just a feather-light kiss on Clarke's forehead before entering her house.

She dropped on her couch, palmed her face and sighed before seeing her phone light up. It was Anya again, this time she opened the full message.

"Princess delivered, safe and sound. Oh and Lexa, she's as smitten as you. If it looks like a duck and talks like a duck and walks like a duck maybe it is in fact a duck. Good Luck"

She typed back. "too late for this shit."

"Just switch duck for date and luck for fuck. I live for this telenovela plot. Keep me posted."

Sometimes she really hated Anya.


	5. Throw me no more bones and I will tell you no lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa has a hangover but there's work to do and The Oasis to visit.

Lexa didn't remember what a hangover was but she was sure she had one. The throbbing headache she had made her think her most valuable item were her sunglasses that she refused to take off.

"Rough night, uh?" She refused to acknowledge Octavia's teasing tone and Lexa was sure the effort she was making not to smirk was only due to the fact that she was Octavia's superior and they had their entire team looking funny at her already.

"Didn't get much sleep." Lexa said loud enough so everybody would know it was the code for "stop looking at me like that".

"Here." Octavia hands her a coffee for the second time this week and it still feels odd. "You can drink it on our way to the Oasis. I also have donuts in the car."  
"Thanks, coffee is more than enough." Not that she could consider putting anything else in her mouth today, or over the next month for the likes of it.

She sat on the car as Octavia finished some paperwork and put the gps coordinates in the device. After she finished and after spacing out again thinking about the previous night Lexa decided to text Clarke. She didn't know why she wanted it, or if she should. She felt like being around Clarke was as easy as breathing and she did say she would text. She was not inspired enough to be bold so the worst that could happen would be that she would have anything to say and she would be massively ignored. 

"Good Morning. I hope you are feeling better than me. It's going to be a long day but it was totally worth it." She was probably overstepping but after writing and erasing so many times it was the final draft that was sent as soon as she heard the driver's door opening.

"Let's go get some action, dear boss."

"Octavia, may I remind you that The Oasis has strict rules. No drinking, no smoking, no fucking. I'm sure action somewhere along the forbidden things of that place." Lexa deadpanned. She heard Octavia chuckle and it was a wonderful sound although it made her pain worse.

"Ew, think about it, how sad and miserable your life must be to think that's a good idea. To join a cult like that."

"Human beings are weird, but actually I get these people. They are desperate and desperate to belong. They'd accept anything just to escape their reality. I can relate to that --"

"But not, to not fucking right? I mean drinking can be bad for you, also smoking, idk facebook can be bad for you but sex?" Good, now Lexa knew sex was a very important part of Officer Octavia's life. What more relevant facts was this day yet to reveal.

"Sometimes you'd renounce everything in hopes it would give you some peace of mind."

"Looks like you know what you are talking about, chief."

"Better than you can imagine." She didn't mean to sound so dense and sad, but it was exactly how she felt.

"Thank you for taking Clarke out. She came back all giddy, she deserves to have a good time."

"It was a pleasure Octavia."

"Sometimes, she and my brother seem to be stuck to each other, you know?" More relevant facts. Lexa hated that she actually wanted to know more. She felt like someone's gossip addicted aunt but she fought it with all her residual strength.

"I have no idea, actually."

"Ok fair enough, but it's like they are two best friends that got drunk and married in vegas and none of them has the heart to admit they made a mistake."

"It's not a bad thing, lot's of people go through it and live entire functional lives."

"Yes, they are young, they should have the guts to take a chance on life. Meet new people, exciting people, fall in love for real. Like me and Lincoln."

"Ah but you see, Octavia, what is right for you is more often than not, not what is right for everybody else." The curves, or perhaps, the conversation were making her dizzy. "You really picked the wrong morning to have serious talks with me."

"Ah but you see, Commander Lexa, my choice of morning was not random. I'm going to be really clear and assertive about this. I saw the way you look at Clarke."

"Octavia I ---" Shit. It's one thing to have a crush, the other is to let it be known to the world. Other than Anya and Raven.

"Shh, lemme finish. I saw the way Clarke looked at you too. There was a spark there, a sudden interest in life - like I bet you Commander Fancy-Pants would put it - and I liked it. It looked good on Clarke and it looked good on you. Now, I'm not implying you should hit on my sister-in-law because it would mean I would be strangely ok with it, I'm just saying keep doing what you are doing. Clarke has been kind of off since her father died and god knows my brother can be mr. egocentric and doesn't do much to change that. He loves Clarke to death, I'm just sure that it's not as a husband." Octavia was looking fierce, she was back at the Octavia she feared in her early days in New Orleans. She knew Octavia was telling her something else that she was no expressing with words but that was hanging over her discourse. Like a permission to hit on Clarke. Who was married to Octavia's brother. And had a dog, a lovely one. Clarke who said she wanted nothing more than to kiss her last night. All of a sudden it was too much for Lexa.

"That is very fascinating Octavia but I'm afraid I have to puke."

"NOT IN THE CAR." Octavia made a pulled a drastic stop so Lexa could open the door and puked all that it was possible to including necessary body fluids. Only then she heard the gps beeping and the lady informing that they had reached their destination.

****

The Oasis was an old house surrounded with nothing. It was clearly a former cotton plantation masters house and that thought alone made Lexa have goosebumps. She was not well versed at the history of the south, but she read the books and heard the stories. Most of them were considered haunted, not that she believed in ghosts but something about ghost stories made her queezy.

Octavia marched in front of her taking the lead, it came natural to her and Lexa couldn't help thinking how great Octavia would be in a task force, coordinating actions and planning ops. 

Before they could know a pretty girl dressed in white opened the door and told them that the enlightened one would receive them in a moment. They sat at the living room and could see a lot of people buzzing about, all predictably wearing white.

"This place gives me the creeps, Commander" Octavia whispers as she chooses to stand behind Lexa as she takes a glass of water the girl, maid, whatever offered her. She would stand if she wasn't half expecting to faint every 5 minutes.

"Tell me about it." 

"Good Morning! I am Jaha, I'm the head of The Oasis and current spokesperson for The Rising Sun. It's an unfortunate thing that happen to our former members."

"Hello Mr. Jaha, I'm Detective Lexa Woods and this is Officer Blake from the New Orleans Police Department, I can see you have been expecting us."

"Of course, the case was all over the news, I appreciate the kind gesture of alerting me you were stopping by. Everyone here is fighting a long hard battle to stay free of the evils and pollution of the real world. Your presence could disturb some of our guests."

"I imagine you must not allow many visits." This man annoyed her just by existing and nothing better to help Lexa back into her feet than the sight of a charlatan. Octavia wasn't speaking and Lexa suspected it was because she looked like she would most likely hit him.

"No. Ours is a closed circle of acceptance. New members must be cleansed before joining us here. We build our own defenses against distractions, sins has the catholics call it although we don't put that much weight in it, strangers might reduce our resistance. Like most diseases, sins are contagious."  
Lexa raised an eyebrow to the speech but chose to not comment on it. The faster she got through with this, the faster she could go home and lay down. 

"So ... former members? How do you know that, I believe the official identification of the bodies was not revealed to the press yet." Lexa tried to walk around the room as she spoke only to have every single door to the inside of the manor's backstage closed just a few inches from her face. 

"I just assumed that, since they knew all the details we apply on our rites, they must have been former members. Some of our brothers and sisters don't have the strength of mind to endure the lowest of the low that precedes the climb for freedom from the world. Four of them have given up on a happy life just the last two months alone. We are a decades old movement, a lot of people followed different paths after being with us."

"Do you have a record of every member that enters The Oasis." Lexa was now scribbling in her notebook, she knew Octavia didn't understand why she wasn't putting all this down on the tablet and putting it immediately on the system. Lexa tried to explain more than once that the way she writes it down and how she reads it when she is putting it on the system are completely different things and provoke other sets of conclusions. She will be laughed at but it has a logic behind it.

"Yes, I will give it to you gladly, if you come back with a warrant. We are very tight about personal data, I'm afraid I need the paperwork to explain the need for this sort of classified data. You see some of our members have more than one skeleton in the closet and they would love to keep it there for as long as they live."

"You see Mr Jaha, I was never very fond of closets. I'm sure to be back here as soon as possible with a warrant to check your premises and also your members information. For now, we won't keep you from your work, have a nice day sir."

"You too Agent woods, Officer Blake. Bridgit will show you the door."

Octavia didn't wait to be in the car to start cursing.

"That son of a bitch, I'm sure he is involved."

"It did look weird, the whole holier than thou attitude, how he wave the need for paperwork right out the bat. Don't mean to be prejudiced but it all sounds very suspect."

"You just didn't like that he mentioned closets."

"That too. I bet he is a homophobe."

"Look at you, Detective Lexa, hater of religious brainwash. It almost makes you look like a human being again. I bet the ghost that haunts that house looks more alive than you did when you got here." Octavia was openly teasing her and Lexa was surprisingly okay with it.

"Can you blame me? What sort of name is Jaha, anyways?"

"I know right?" It was the last thing she heard Octavia saying before she zoned out reading Clarke's name on the screen, she replied to her text.

"Is this what dying feels like? If so, I'm glad I got to know you before I go. Goodnight again, charming commander."

She didn't even try to hide the stupid soft smile of her face.


	6. Of flowers and cacti

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our heroes meet sooner than they expected.nMostly fluff because what the world needs now, is love sweet love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, i hope you enjoy this.

The only reason Clarke managed to wake up at decent hours was because she really want to prep Bellamy up for his big day, she was supposed to do it in the previous evening and she was feeling a bit guilty she went out instead. Turns out it was not the only reason she was feeling guilty but her headache told her not to dwell in that. She'd deal with it when she got at least two more hours of sleep and an aspirine.

"So are you feeling confident?" She was wearing the silliest pijamas ever but she knew Bellamy couldn't care less, he still wore bart simpson boxers (his "lucky" boxers). He was wearing them right now.  
"Not at all, I don't know why I'm feeling nervous. I've known Marcus for years."  
"One thing it's to know him socially and academically, the other is to have him as your boss. You were always so keen to impress him, it's only natural that you are afraid to mess it up. It'll be alright, babe, you've always been good at this stuff." She meant his ability to make everybody like him. He was so easy going, he had only to flash his smile and the whole room was instantly enchanted.   
"Thanks." He said not even sitting down, drinking his coffee careful not to spill and ruin his perfectly white shirt. The whole suit look didn't fit him at all, Clarke tried to tell him that yesterday. Octavia also tried, Lincoln helped them though, he convinced him to drop the tie. Bellamy always looked like someone put a noose around his neck and was seconds away from opening a hatchet beneath him when he was forced to wear a tie, he was just so desperate to get this right.

She couldn't help but think at that first time she saw Lexa, wearing a suit. Damn did she look good. Octavia later explained the reason why she wore that suit under the intense Louisiana sun, she mentioned it was her wedding suit and it made Clarke impossibly sad. She thought how sad Octavia would be if something happened to Lincoln.   
It did occur to her that even if she was in front of Bellamy it wasn't her own example of a marriage that she seeked out. Bellamy was not in love with her, she was not in love with Bellamy. They both knew they were best friends, they made a great team but passion was never part of the equation. She couldn't help but sigh, he didn't notice, because he ran again upstairs to chance his cuff buttons yet again. "You are going to be late, Bells, those are just fine!" She yelled. She was more of a mother than a wife and it exhausted her. 

She certainly didn't remember the last night she felt so giddy over someone as she did last night with Lexa. She had only been awake for half an hour and she had to use all her might not to embark on solo trips of flashbacks. So far she had to stop herself from replaying the moment Lexa kissed her knuckles as she said goodbye. It's wierd as something so simple could convey so much emotion.   
Then it came the cringe, she put her hand on Lexa's thigh. Lexa who seemed like she worked hard to keep people at distance, Lexa who most likely hated to be touched unless she specifically asked to. And what did Clarke do? Manage to keep touching her all the time during last night.  
She got a text from Lexa and her heart started beating a little faster, that was not good. She remembered Lexa's promise but never thought she would come through with it, not after her unexcusable behaviour.

It doesn't matter that she caught Lexa staring at her like she was the best painting she's ever seen, or that she might once or twice entertain the thought that the both of them would make an insanely handsome couple. It was uncalled for and she would not repeat it. She was going to keep her hands away from Lexa at all times if they meet again. Which she had serious doubts about that, at least on a social context. If there was one word O used to describe Lexa was reserved. And also cold, cold hard bitch in full, but Lexa was being all but that with her. Maybe she liked Clarke as well --- that was a train of thought that Clarke absolutely did not want to hop in.

She walked Bellamy out of the door, whispering several reassuring words. She gave him a kiss on his cheek and opened the door only to find Lincoln who was finally home after a night shift at the hospital. They exchanged pleasantries and Bellamy went on his way with both of them waving at him as he drove out of the driveway.

"He'll nail it, don't worry." Lincoln said with his cool voice and charming smile.  
"I know he will, he's living the dream. I'll only start on the gallery next week thank god, it's been an intense landing here in New Orleans."

"You seem worried, Clarke. Is there something you want to tell me about? I have to wind down, I'll never be able to sleep now it will mess my sleeping schedule even more that it is. Would you like to go and have brunch with me? We'll take Python and find somewhere we can stay with him outside."

"Yeah, that would be great, thanks. Let me just get changed real quick." She needed the distraction more than she needed the hours of sleep. She had a feeling that if she stayed home she might not sleep and would keep entertaining flashbacks.

 

"Hey....hum... Lexa" Octavia said tentively as Lexa finished the reports necessary to get the data warrant for The Oasis. Lexa had been working non-stop since they came back to the bureau. She was furiously typing all morning and her only fuel had to be fury since she hadn't even manage to have another cup of coffee. Octavia was feeling something odd, she knew the name of the feeling although she wasn't familiar with it. A bit of regret for coming up too strong over Clarke to Lexa, she didn't mean to make Lexa more sick, which the subject obviously did. It was typical of her, she was always brash and rude and upfront and not everybody knew how to handle her. That's why she and Lincoln would be such a good married couple. He was sensible, wise beyond his years and kinder than most people she knew. She knew exactly how lucky she was to find him. She couldn't imagine losing him, she couldn't imagine what Lexa went through. Lexa finally stopped typing as if finally realising there was someone else in the room. She looks up her glasses and her expression softens even though Octavia feels she's always a bit more uptight around her.

"Officer Blake, I've finished the report. Would you like to revise it?"

"You are asking me? To revise your report?" Octavia was flattered, but suspicious.

"Yes, your commitment to the case has been complete it's only fair you have a say on how I expose it to the judge." Lexa said matter-of-factly like it was no big deal. Except it was, according to Octavia. 

"I'm sure you did it perfectly but I'll proof read it if you want." Lexa motioned her to come behind her desk. She leaned over the detective's shoulder as she read. She changed a few things, feeling bold and half expecting Lexa to shoot her down. But she didn't and Octavia felt she was one step closer to becoming what she always wanted. It was mere ilusion, at least until she passed her detective exams but it was nice to have a taste of it. 

"Thank you, Octavia." Lexa said and she meant it. Who knew Miss Hot Shot would be a team player?

"Actually Lexa, I came here for another reason. I noticed you haven't been eating anything."

"How observant of you, Officer Blake, I wonder what gave me away."

"Ah-ha, the point is Commander Smart ass, my boyfriend just asked me to join him at a brunch in a place nearby. I wonder if you'd like to come with us. I swear to you, he is the kind one of the relationship. there is yet to be born the person that doesn't like Lincoln."

"Thank you, but I really didn't want to intrude --"

"I have no obligation to invite you, Lexa, if I'm asking it's because I'd very much like you to intrude. Specially since you look paler than the corpses at my brother's house."

"okay, I guess." Lexa said defeated and hungry, she didn't really have the strength to fight octavia's logic.

 

They started walking towards the place, Lincoln had texted her the address and on their way they managed to keep polite small talk, maybe they were getting better at this whole partner thing.

Lexa did stop window shopping at a flowerist.

"Are you thinking of buying it for someone?" Octavia said as she watched Lexa caressing a few flowers' petals, Who would know fierce commander was such a flower fairy? 

"Ah no, I just... I really love flowers but I don't buy them anymore...not since, you know, Costia passed away. They remind me too much of her funeral now. I just missed having some colour in my flat." She kept leaning down to smell them, looking ever so soft and delicate. 

"How about a cactus?"

"Of course you would like cacti, Octavia. They are resilient and prickly as yourself." Lexa chuckled, feeling a bit more lively.

"I'll take that as a compliment, but I'm serious. Like cacti have flowers as well, they blossom at specific times and as far as I know nobody ever takes cactus as a funeral thing. They are perfect for helping you break that association."

"I guess you are right, maybe just a small one." She looked over the cacti shelf and chose a small one with bright pink flower.

"Exactly, chief, baby steps."

 

It was a bit of a shock for Clarke to see Lexa approaching her table. She did eventually notice Octavia next to her but Lexa in a suit kind of blinds anyone. Well it blinds her that's for sure.

At first there's an awkwardness, she feels like she's blushing and smiling like a teenager first admiting to have a crush but then Octavia starts explaining how their morning went. She could sense Lexa getting more confortable and that relaxed her as well.

"You know Lexa, you should really take the rest of the day off." Lincoln said, in a doctorish tone, echoing Octavia's concerns.

"I'm afraid it's not possible, not at this point of the investigation." Lexa said. She wanted to ask only for a coffee but Clarke worked all her charm to convince her of the perks of a real meal. She was feeling bad over seeing Lexa so hang over, she could tell that Lexa really wasn't used to drinking. Now that her headache was gone she was actually in a good mood. She scooted closer to Lexa with the excuse of getting in the shade the brunette was on. 

"You could go for a walk with me, please? I need to take Python to the park, see if he manages to run for a while. You'll see the fresh air and sun will do you good," Clarke asked after she got a text from Octavia asking her to help her Lexa. 

Lexa said yes, again, relunctantely. When she asked if Lincoln and Octavia were joining them they both declined.

"We'll have a quickie in the car before getting back to work" octavia deadpanned and everyone in the table finched at the mental image.

"You mean in our cop car?" Lexa said wide eyed.

"Well, yeah, Lincoln walked here. Don't worry though, you can have it for yourself tomorrow lunch!" She smirked devilishly. Lincoln chuckled so Lexa turned to stare at Clarke who was raising her eyebrow.

"I would much rather please myself in the comfort of my home, but thanks for the offer Officer Blake." Lexa replied while looking in her purse for her wallet. She missed Clarke blushing hard at the mental image the remark gave her. 

*****  
"Thanks for inviting me, Clarke, I think I needed this more than I thought." Lexa said as they watched over the golden retriever playing at the dog park.

"You are welcome, I really enjoy being around you. I fell so calm, so collected it has to be something contagious about you."

"You give me too much credit Clarke, I'm just a poor, boring sap. You'll find better company in this town than me." She could barely understand why Anya remained her friend but she also hates people. They have that in common. 

"You really need to stop doing that. You know emo stayed in the first decade of the 2000, it's not hot anymore" Just like that Clarke broke her no touching rule taking Lexa's arm and wraping hers around it.

"I'm really trying Clarke" Lexa said staring deep into Clarke's eyes "I even bought a cactus, I stopped buying flowers since---"

Before she could explain she felt Clarke's fingers on her lips shushing her. She couldn't help closing her eyes to the feeling. 

"That's good, you are moving on, you are moving forward. Be positive. There's so much beauty in this world Lexa, if one just stops and stares for a while."

"Lately the only beauty I manage to see is you." Lexa said and opened her eyes in shock realising that she said it out loud. She saw the surprise look on Clarke's face and started imediately thinking about the best way to backpedal.

"Thank you, but I guess that means you don't have mirrors at your place." Ew tacky much, Griffin? If she ever told Raven she actually used her lame university line she'll never hear the end of it. But she must have said something right because Lexa was laughing out loud.

"That's a fabulous pick up line, i hope i remember it when I go back to dating. Tell me Griffin, is that what brings all the boys and the girls to the yard?" 

"That and my wonderful boobs." Clarke decided to for the yolo mentality she had back in the day, there was no harm in a little flirting right?

"They are wonderful indeed, but everything about you is incredible Clarke. I mean you bring dead people back to life." Lexa was giving her a crooked smile she hadn't seen before as she was leaning against the railing of the park. She said it non-chalantly while checking on Python only to go back and look Clarke dead in the eye.

Clarke leaned as well getting a little closer to Lexa, closer than it was advisable. 

"You mean that dead people in my house."

"No, I mean myself Clarke, I was a dead woman walking before I met you. I don't know what it is about you Clarke, i don't mean to be disrespectable but I just can't help myself around you." Lexa's voice was lower than usual, it made Clarke's breath catch. All she could do is sigh, she turned to lean her head on Lexa's shoulder. She felt something light on her forehead only to realise that Lexa had planted a soft kiss there. It burned like someone put a blazing iron to carve Lexa's lips there. She put her arms around Lexa like she did the previous night. 

"Look at us, we look like some crooked, gay version of Nicholas Sparks." Clarke said against Lexa's neck. She heard Lexa's laugh and again it sounded like the best thing she's ever heard.

"Only because you fill the part of the mandatory blonde. And the golden retriever is always a nice prop!" Lexa said earning a soft punch in her arms

"Shhhh don't hear her Python, you are my furry son and you know it." Clarke covered Python's ears for him not to listen to her. Lexa was smiling and Clarke started leaning against her again. When Lexa's hips reached the railing, Clarke placed her hands on each sides of it and whispered "Please give me one...good...reason..." Clarke looking at Lexa's lips, who licks them instinctively. This is it. They are going to kiss, in a park... 

They get interrupted by a ring, they keep their staring contest for a few more seconds before Lexa comes down as if from a transe and picks up her phone.

"Lexa Woods." She keeps staring at Clarke who is impatiently waiting for her to put down the phone. "Hum...I'll be on my way." 

"I hate that phone." Clarke whispered.

"Saved by the bell huh?" Lexa gave her a sympathetic look " there's more people missing from the Oasis"

"Didn't you need a warrant to investigate them?" Clarke was still annoyed but her curiosity was getting the best of her.

"Yeah but it was Jaha itself that reported the missing people." 

"What do you think made him change his mind?" Clarke asked as she put the leash on Python's collar and Lexa extended her hand to take  the dog's leash. Which was surprising, Clarke was married to Bellamy who hated walking Py, to see someone volunteering to take it it's a nice change.

"One of the missing members is his son." Lexa started followed by her dog, Clarke stayed a little behind and allowed the sight to sink in and damn, wouldn't they be an insanely good-looking gay ass Nicholas Sparks kind of couple?

"Oh!" Was all that Clarke could say as it dawned on her that usually all Nicholas Sparks novels end badly. She shook the thought with her "it's not like anything would happen, I'm married" and did a little run to catch up with them. It was starting to sound like the worst excuse ever but she would hold on to it for as long as she could.


	7. Fools

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little self love never hurt anybody right?

Lexa sat on the table in front of Jaha, her legs crossed, Octavia couldn't help but roll her eyes, of course she couldn't do anything like everybody else.  
"Start talking." Octavia ordered over Lexa's shoulder, Lexa kept writing notes down but didn't say a word. She was either registing every shift in body language Jaha presented or just simply trying to get on his nerves. She didn't know Agent Woods well enough to make an educated guess on that.  
"My kid, Wells, he was a part of our congregation. He understood the message and the words ALIE left for us."  
"Can you spell that? A-L-L-Y, H-A-Y-L-E-Y?" Lexa asked without taking her eyes of the note pad.  
"A-L-I-E. It's our deity, it's through her that we'll reach the city of light." Jaha looked peaceful, pleased to spread his word. Neither Lexa or Octavia were having any of his shit.  
"And where is that exactly? The City of Light?" Octavia sat down on the chair that was meant for Lexa, this conversation was tiring her and she wasn't exactly a pro at asking questions, she always thought of herself as a woman of action.  
"I believe it's a state of mind, right?" Lexa raised her eyes and stared at Jaha's.  
"Yes, exactly."  
"So why did your son refuse to get there when it was clearly on his reach."  
"You see, Wells was always a bit problematic... sometimes it seems he gets a kick out of questioning my faith. I thought he was better but it seems like he came back on his old ways. Besides we accepted a girl and she was messing with his mind, she was among one of the dead at the house, i'm afraid my son left the safety of our haven to avenge his friend."  
"Friend?" Lexa questioned while she hesitated writing the word down.  
"Special friend." Jaha confessed lowering his eyes.  
"Ah, that no sex policy makes you really unpopular." Octavia smirked and she knew she was affecting him. There was a vein on his forehead ready to pop.  
"You realize that if it wasn't that stupid rule your son and his "special" friend could be safe this very moment?" Lexa said it without a hint of provocation, just merely stating the facts.  
"The ALIE instruct us that way, maybe the ending they got was merely a consequence of their lifestyle." Jaha said calmly before Octavia threw a cup of cold coffee to his face and stormed out of the room.

"OCTAVIA!!!" Lexa followed her out the door, regretting letting a rookie in the interrogation room. She picked her by the arm and stormed into Indra's office.  
"What the???" Indra wanted to ask but could only set her glasses on the table.  
"There's no way that kind of attitude is helping us on the case." Lexa didn't yell, she was imposing order through logic. "His manners already tell us so much, I think he knows what happen to those people. We need to get him, you lose all logic and reason when you behave like that, you might even set him free."  
"He is a liar, an explorer of weaker minds, LEXA! It's people like him that allow those hillbillies to kick my friends leaving him to die in a ditch like my friend Miller. Just because they are gay. He is the worse --"  
"Don't you think I don't know that???" Lexa whispers. "Nobody knows it better, that's why I want to get this asshole in jail. But I need your help and with your wits about. Not venting and hot headed."  
"She's right, you know, you have heart kid but some people can use that to their advantage and this crook looks exactly that sort of person. What he doesn't know is that we have his kid safe and sound under our watch. Wells Jaha is part of our witness program and he is willing to cooperate with us." Indra's special force was handling it. "So go there, do your job, squeeze everything out of their son of a bitch. I have some things to discuss with Lexa."

+++++

Clarke.

Clarke. Clarke.

Clarke. Clarke. Clarke.

Lexa kept twirling in her bed. She wondered if counting in Clarkes backwards from a hundred would help her calm down. She was just worked up as was Octavia, she just had a better way to conceal it.

She would not be seeing Clarke again, ever. Not outside from the necessary since her work depended on finding out how people died on the Blake's future home.

Clarke.

Her ridiculous blonde hair was not letting her fall asleep. It had been a rough day, the worst day, the worst hangover.

The walk in the park with python was like heaven, a pause from real life. But it had to stop.

The stupid hoarse voice, the stupid laughter. She hated that it was such a good day. Because of Clarke.

She could no longer hide it, she was crushing hard. And Clarke was married to Octavia's brother, who she was growing immensely fond of.

Lexa couldn't sleep because Clarke Griffin (Blake?) was ruining her life. Only fools felt this way she knew, only fools fell for married unattainable person, she didn't need this mindless suffering in her life but it was getting the best of her.

She kept listing the things bothering her about Clarke.

Her blue eyes for once, so attentive, so focused on her every time she spoke near her. Her larger than life smile, seriously, that smile could solve 8 out of 10 world problems. Her beautiful skin, that was starting to get tanned from all the time wearing those tank tops and short shorts that showed her long perfect legs.

Was Lexa thinking about someone's legs like...like she was sexually attracted to them? That was a first in a long long time. She was sure her attraction to Clarke wasn't merely emotional when she paused to imagine Clarke's cleavage. Damn, her body was absurd.  
Lexa sat on her bed. She was fully aware normal people didn't fall asleep that early but she really needed to be at her best the next day, she was going to interrogate Wells and she had to rest.

She almost forgot that sexual frustration could be a thing, let alone physically hurt.

Lexa also knew it would be so easy to fall asleep if she only allowed herself to have a little solo action. Maybe her remark earlier the day had set the seed for this state she was. Of course she would never use the cop car for sex. Of course she and Clarke would never so much as kiss, let alone fuck.

But she needed her rest, she was tense behind her limit, she needed relief.

Before she could stop herself she imagined how it would feel to back Clarke against her cop car and kiss her hard. She would grab Clarke's waist and pull herself against her, grinding against the car. She could feel Clarke's thigh wrapping against her body and she would grind as slow as she could until she heard the blonde moan.  
She would then open the back door of the car and lay her down the back seat, Lexa would take her time taking Clarke's top, kissing every inch of her body until the blonde begged her to give her what she wanted.  
She would take Clarke's underwear and touch her where she was touching herself right there. If she was being successful, Lexa was kind of rusty and too eager to be graceful with her own body but she hoped she would be smoother touching Clarke's center.  
She forgot the last time she was so wet thinking about someone and it only reenforced what she already knew. She wanted Clarke, she wanted her hard. Lexa bit her lip trying not to moan Clarke's name out loud, as if trying to contain her own desire only in the realm of her mind, she entertained on how it would feel to thrust a finger inside Clarke and then a second her slightly faster, slightly harder. It wasn't until she wondered how it would feel to have Clarke's raspy voice saying her own name over and over that relief came and washed all her anxieties away.  
Breathless and slightly ashamed, Lexa pulled her covers and finally felt like she could realistically fall asleep.


	8. Out of Control

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a little side chapter with Octavia's POV

When Lexa came around, she was way too easy to hate. She was the big shot, she was the detective new york, where real murders happened. CSI sort of shit.  
She appeared in her ridiculous suit, way too formal to be worn every day. I hated her. I don't hate her anymore.

We were not welcoming, she was closed off it's not how a good friendship is supposed to start. But it flourished surprisingly, maybe it was because I learned about her dead wife, maybe it was because she's pretty good at what she does. She ain't no Indra but she's got potential and the dedication.

She was starting to grow on me, then something unreal happens. Dead people show up at my brother's new home and she meets Clarke.  
She was completely solemn and professional, Clarke on the other hand was a trainwreck. I've known Clarke since forever and I know when The Griff gets a crush and their chemistry is undeniable.  
So, what to do? What to do? Octavia Blake with an ethical dilemma. That never happens. If there's something I have pretty set in stone are my values and seeing my sister in law crush over my boss should be a no brainer. At the very least, I'd stay on my brother's side by default.

When I saw Clarke kissing Lexa's cheek when she took her out on a date. That's what it was...a date. I was furious, I texted Lincoln about it, I couldn't stay silent. I almost said something to Bellamy but he was freaking out on a call over his new job with someone.

O : You won't believe it. Lexa is crushing on Clarke!! WTF??? What should I do?  
Lincoln : Are you sure it's not the other way around?  
O : Why? What? You haven't seen the way Lexa looks at her, it's sickening. It's like a lost and lonely puppy, it's hardly the Lexa I know.  
Lincoln: O, you know Clarke isn't happy. With any of this, not the move, not the dead, not New Orleans, not with Bellamy. Maybe she's projecting?  
O: Projecting?  
Lincoln: Lexa is everything your brother is not, from what you tell me about her. Maybe she's reaching for a way out of everything, from what you tell me of her. Maybe it's making her feel again.  
O: What's wrong with my brother? uh?  
Lincoln: Nothing. He's just not in love with Clarke and you know it.  
O: How is that a justification for her cheating? Would you cheat on me if...?  
Lincoln: If what? I married the right Blake unlike Clarke 


	9. Colours

It's a stupid idea. She's married and you, you swore you would be to forever.  
I know that Costia is dead and people have been rooting for me to move on. I'm desperate to move on. But this...this is a stupid idea.  
I hate that I can't keep my self control around her, it seems like I'm a teenager again. I must not lust over Clarke Griffin starting today.  
I got called into the station, Jaha finally decided to cooperate since it's his kid that is missing, now he cares.

We decided to start interviewing former members of the rising sun and again I was teamed up with Octavia. I wish I could just dissolve this wierd silence between us by yelling "I WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH CLARKE." But it's a lie and I would look stupid. More stupid than I do already.

"Spill it out, Lexa. It's a long drive and you look like your eyes are going to pop out of your skull anytime now."

"I...I'm staying away from Clarke from now on." She mumbled instead.

"Why?"

"I really don't get it?? You sound disappointed."

"And I am!!"

"But why, I'm just saying I won't get around your sister in law!"

"Because you look like you've been brought back to life since you met her, it's unbelievable the difference, you are not even wearing a SUIT?!"

"Because it's too hot!"

"Clarke relaxes you, she takes that dark cloud over your head. I like you better since you guys met. Now, everybody knows there's something special about it. It would break Clarke's heart to know you want to throw it out the window."

"Clarke's heart is the reason you can't do that! You are the only good thing she got out of New Orleans."

"That makes no sense, she moved to have a fresh start with her husband!"

"Then why is that you are the reason she is sighing around the house?"

"You can't possible know that!"

This is the most annoying, pointless conversation she has ever had in her personal or professional life. So I look at my phone and I hope for a way out of it. There's a message from Clarke, she's thanking me for spending time with her and Python. There's an adorable picture of her and the dog chilling in the porch each of them with a glass of wine in front of them. Just as she is going to put down the phone she gets another, "wish you were here".

"Look at yourself on your mirror, right this second. What's that smirk? What's that lightness around your face?" Octavia is being cocky but she can't help staring at herself in her side mirror. "That was from C wasn't it?"

"Yeah." If Octavia had any hearing problem she wouldn't have gotten it, but she doesn't she has a better hearing than a bat.

"You are so screwed you know, when you done feeling sorry for yourself, when you decide to actively pursuit what makes you happy then I'll be here to help you out." Octavia gave her a hand and Lexa shook it.

"Thank you."

"Don't mention it."

****

It took Clarke half an hour to take a picture with python sitting pretty on the porch. She wanted to do something adorable to cheer up Lexa, she looked pretty stressed out when Clarke left her.

Bellamy still hasn't come home and she's a little anxious to know how the first day go. Lincoln walks by and sees the glass of wine in front of the dog.

"Is he going to have that?"

"No, I was just trying to take a funny picture to sent to..." She trails off, not really sure Lincoln would be the right person to tell this.

"To Bellamy?" Seeing the smile fall off Clarke's face, he can't help but laugh out loud. "Just messing with you, Lexa is a good person. Don't let O tell you other wise. As you know, the more she likes someone the more she grills them. Lexa is no exception."

"Is it obvious?" Clarke says and she can't really decided how to define this giddyness that she feels around Lexa.

"Your crush." Yeah my crush. "Yes, it kind of is."

"Oh Lincoln, what can I do?" She sinks deeper in the chair while Lincoln sits down on the floor smiling widely at her.

"You'll figure something out and if it goes wrong you know what we say: Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim."

"You and Octavia are such geeks."

***

"We are getting nowhere Octavia." Lexa whispered as they walked to a small house on the suburbian New Orleans. They had knocked on 5 doors only to have them shut on their noses.

"Let's just look at this dude, he and one of the girls that were found dead at the house used to date. Maybe we can figure out what made them go to separate ways."

Lexa knocked down on the door loudly "NOPD. PLEASE ANSWER THE DOOR"

"I know nothing, please, I tried really hard to leave The rising sun, I won't go back." Travis was a small man, slender, pale, scared. 

"Listen all we want to know is what happened to your ex girlfriend, I assume you are not together, that could lead to her murder." He's not surprised by the word murder and for some reason Lexa finds it odd.

"I'm sorry I don't know anything. Please leave me be."

"Sir, you can either answer our questions here or at the police station." Octavia is already getting annoyed. Maybe it would work, maybe it will just make them chase him down the house and neighbourhood and Lexa was not in the mood for a jog today.

It was then that Lexa noticed the red dot rising through the man's shirt. Before she could say anything the red reached his forehead and the bullet reached it's target. She pushed octavia down to the floor and under a rain of bullets she crawled behind their car where they stayed until their back up reached the scene.


	10. Waiting Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little post shooting chapter!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, sorry, sorry I got caught up on things. I'm back on this fic. thank you for your patience. love you, you sweet cinnamon buns.

Lexa couldn't stop staring at her oxford shoes while waiting on the waiting room. They were worn, she needed to change the soles of them, they were as tired and worn as she was. She was antropomorphing shoes. I guess lack of sleep does that to you.  
She was released after they checked up on her, she had nothing but scratches on her. The arm of her blazer was ruined but that's a cheap deal when you get out alive of a shooting. She couldn't help thinking she and Octavia are alive due to the shooters mercy and not due to a lack of ability. He sure hit their witness and made him quite dead. Back to step one again.  
Octavia was just going to the machine to get them coffee, she was taking an awful long time, but Lexa knew about waiting rooms and their ability to stretch the fabric of time. There's only so much you can study your own nails, they are just waiting for their hospital sheets so they could go home. They were kind enough to let her wait outside her assigned room, the smell of it reminded her of Costia's last days and that was something she wouldn't bear.

"Hey" She didn't notice the person standing next to her until she heard the whisper. Lexa raises her eyes drinking in the figure next to her, by the waist she already knows who this is.  
"Hello, Clarke. I wasn't expecting to see you." Lexa is quite numb half because she doesn't really believe Clarke is really here and the other half because she really doesn't know how to act around the blonde.  
"Oh god, the hell with it!" Clarke launches herself towards her and sits on her lap. In the middle of the waiting room, Lexa would be shocked if she managed to actually react to it. " How are you? The doctors say you didn't suffer any injures, but there was some guy on the other side of the street that filmed the whole thing, and I watched it because I didn't know it was you, it was that stupid autoplay function on fb and then I recognized you and Octavia and I came as fast as I could."  
"Breathe, Clarke, Breathe."  
"I came bawling all the way, It's a miracle I didn't get in an accident, I could barely drive through the tears. I can't lose you too, Lexa, I just can't." Clarke was clinging to her neck and the old lady opposite to them was giving Lexa a sympathetic look, she finally woke from her trance and held Clarke tighter.  
"Lose me too? Who else did you lose, Clarke?" She asks softly.  
"My dad, he was my best friend everything has been such a mess since then, but then you showed up and it looked like things were getting better and then I saw that damn video and..."  
"Hey, hey, look at me." She grabbed Clarke's face and wiped the tears down her cheeks with her thumbs. Her voice was calm, soothing and she wanted to be as sweet as she could be. Although it really didn't come naturally to her, but she would make an effort for Clarke. It was hard for her with everyone, but Clarke wasn't everyone, it's no use denying it now. Not when she almost lost her life and the person that came into her mind was this blonde sitting on her lap. She puts their foreheads together. "I'm not going anywhere."  
"Promise?"  
"As it is humanly possible, I will not leave you."  
"You mean the city?" Clarke is now looking her in her eyes, positively fishing if she heard what she thinks she heard.  
"No, Clarke Griffin, I will not leave YOU unless extraordinary circumstances beyond my control separate us." Lexa is serious, while Clarke starts laughing in the midst of tears.  
"You do have a weird way of saying you care about me." Clarke jokes not really believing her.  
"I mean it Clarke, I don't know what you do or what sort of power you have on me but by God I cannot tear away from you." Lexa knows she sounded mad, angry even.  
Clarke intertwines their fingers and stares at their hands together, not without pervying at the fact that Lexa has unusually long fingers.  
"You mean it?"  
"I do."  
"So I'm not crazy, you feel this too Lexa?"  
"Yes."  
"Your heart beats faster around me, the coincidences, the way you always know what to say and what I want to hear."  
"YES." Lexa hisses.  
"On a scale of one to Trump how wrong would it be for me to kiss you right now." Clarke whispers alternating her gaze from Lexa's eyes and mouth.  
"You know it would be trump due to the fact that someone is annoyingly married." Lexa says with a smirk forming in the corners of her lips.  
"Damn..." Clarke face palms hard. She wears footsteps behind her but she is too busy cursing her life choices.  
"Don't worry." Lexa says softly taking her hand of her face and tugging a bit of hair behind Clarke's ear. "We'll figure something out. I'm not going anywhere."

"Oh God please tell me it's the concussion and you guys aren't making out in plain sight???" Octavia speaks and makes both of them jump off the bench.


	11. Sinnerman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Octavia and Lexa decide to stalk Jaha's right hand and try to find new leads.

"What were you thinking, Lexa?" Octavia asks after two hours of excruciating silence while they waited for Murphy to finish his date with a girl they identified as Emory. They followed him since he left the Rising Sun headquarters escaping from the window after curfew, if he escapes for a date maybe he does other stuff as well. He can even be the deserter they are looking for and lead them to the missing people.  
"Uh?" Lexa was lost in he thoughts and didn't register her the first time.  
"I SAID what were you thinking?" Octavia repeats turning her head to Lexa this time. She knows Lexa knows what she's talking about.  
"I think it's pretty clear I wasn't." Lexa offers looking down, she's certainly not proud.  
"I said you had my blessing for falling for Clarke not to cheat on my brother and NOT to make him look like a fool."  
"I know, I'm sorry. I don't know what came of me. I don't seem to be myself around her."  
"Well, get a grip, you two are hardly horny teenagers. I've talked to her ok?" Octavia says, Lexa swears she heard a hint of guilt on her voice. "She didn't take it very well, she might be a little cold to you from now on."  
"I deserve it."  
"No, you don't." Octavia's voice is soft, like a whisper.  
"I don't understand." Again, Lexa, was waiting to be scolded. Octavia was full of surprises.  
"I wanted her to do something about it as in tell my brother and be honest. She's feeling guilty and wants to give another chance to their marriage. I'm sorry Lexa."  
"Shouldn't Clarke be the one telling me this?" Lexa asks but their train of thought is interrupted when someone on the bike stops in front of the dinner and Murphy rushes out to give him something.  
"Should we follow the bike guy?" Octavia asks her attention shifting to the work at hands.  
"Yes, yes." Lexa puts the key in the ignition and start the motor.

"So you like Lexa." Raven asks putting a glass of whisky in front of Clarke. It's still early, there's only a few clients in the bar and Raven can sit down and talk for a while.  
"I do."  
"And still, you want to try again with Bellamy." Raven says raising her eyebrow. Clarke chugs down her drink and asks for the refill, this is not going to end well.  
"Yes."  
"You know Griff, you were never Captain Logic but this is probably your best work so far." Raven obliges her and fills the cup.  
"Octavia said the same thing, are you guys tag teaming against me?"  
"OCTAVIA KNOWS?"  
"I live with her and she works with Lexa. We haven't been subtle. She says she gives her blessing only if I tell Bellamy."  
"A sane person. I always knew she was the smarter Blake."  
"Hey!" Clarke hits her arm. "Stop it ok, just because you are all about making Rainbow Griffin shine again doesn't mean this is ok!"  
"Why Clarke? Why are you so fond of making yourself into a martyr? Are you going to appologize for falling in love with someone else?"  
"YES as I should." Clarke drowns her cup again and it's a glass away from crying. Even if she hates to see Clarke cry, Raven fills the cup again.  
"Clarke. What do you feel about Lexa?"  
"I don't know. She's tough, but she's a softie. She's stern but she makes me laugh, she has the best smile in the world. She desperately wants to pet python but acts all cool like she's a cat person. She's damn good looking and dapper as fuck ---"  
"Uh-hum I have to agree on that." Raven says whistling at the end. "That day you brought her here, I couldn't stop staring. And that ridiculously, imaculated shirt who does she think she is?"  
"YES EXACTLY, who does she think she is?!" And the third cup is down, on to the fourth onwards and upwards from now on. "Wait you want her too?"  
"No."  
"Then why are you saying that. you don't find her attractive?"  
"Honestly. if she came to the bar dressed like that, wearing that smile she wears around you and asked me if I wanted a drink, I'd have it Clarke."  
It's as if all the alcohol finally kicked in and Clarke stares at Raven clueless. "You are making me jealous, Raven."  
"I'm just trying to make a point."  
"I don't want you oogling over her."  
"You don't want competition?"  
"No." And on the fifth.  
"Then maybe you should do something about it." Raven makes her stare deep into her brown eyes. It feels a lot like drowning and Clarke finally caves and cries.  
"I don't want to hurt Bellamy."  
"Oh honey I know, but you are not doing anyone a favour by suffering. Where's that tattoo you did for Mister Griff?"  
Clarke raises her sleeve and see as Raven's hand passes over it, reminding her of the first time she saw Lexa.  
"Should I speak with her?"  
"Yes, explain it to her, tell her what you think, ask her to wait. Then sort your shit out, Princess."  
"Thank you, I'll text her to pick me up. There's no way in hell I'm driving like this."  
"Good Call."

"This isn't going anywhere!" Octavia huffs. She's tired, it's cold and since the guy entered a bikers bar nothing happened and his bike is still outside.  
"I've already asked for Finn to come by to take our place." They have been silent again. Lexa's phone buzzes with a message, Octavia can't help but read the name of the sender.  
"You are not going to read that?"  
"Nope."  
"Don't be silly!"  
"Make up your mind Octavia. I can't with this I approve this and disapprove that rule book you are trying to impose."  
"Alright I'm sorry, Clarke didn't say anything to me. I was just trying to find a way to make you understand that you shouldn't make my brother feel stupid."  
Lexa rolls her eyes, she reads the text and Clarke wants to chat. Like this night hasn't been awfully long until now. She would ignore it if there was ever a way for her to ignore Clarke. She texted her to inform her that as soon as the stake out is finished she'll go get her at Nevermore.  
"Our guy is leaving." Lexa states and gets Octavia by surprise her. "What does your gut feeling say O, shall we confront him?"  
"We should."  
"Good call, Officer Blake." 

They leave the car and wait for the guy next to his parked bike. They see Finn and Indra, stopping their car on the far end of the street, if this went sour they at least had some back up.  
"New Orleans PD, I'm Detective Woods and I would like to ask you some questions."  
"I have nothing to tell you." The guy tells them. He is surprisingly well dressed for a common motard. Something is fishy in here.  
"What about that envelope you received at the Belle du Jour dinner about 2 hours ago that you proceeded to deliver here."  
"I know nothing about it, I was just asked to pick it up and deliver it here."  
"Deliver it to whom?" Octavia asks, Lexa can see the tendency to play the bad cop.  
"I ain't talking to you."  
"Would you be more willing to talk while you are accused of obstructing justice?"  
"Look. I'm clean, all the text said was to deliver the envelope to Pike, but now you have to give me protection or something this people are dangerous."  
"Who the biker gang?" Octavia jumps on the hint.  
"Nah, those are my bro's, I mean the guys in the funky house. They give me the creeps."   
"That makes two of us, thank you for your information Mister?"  
"Wick, my name is Wick."  
"We'll be in touch."

"We are not going to speak to Pike?"  
"No. Not today."  
"Why? We are here, we have back up."  
"Patience, Officer Blake, knowing when to strike is almost as important as knowing where to strike."  
"You creep me out sometimes, Lexa."  
"I'll take that as a compliment!"

 

"You wanted to see me?" Lexa says sitting next to Clarke.  
"Thank God you are here." Clarke clings to her neck and inhales deeply the scent of her hair. "I want you."  
"Clarke I..." Lexa blushes harder than she thought it was possible. "I wasn't expecting that."  
"Was that why you were frowning when you came?"   
"Yes, I thought you were going to say you never wanted to see me again."  
"Silly Lexa, I want to see you all day, errry day." So Clarke wasn't lying about being too drunk to drive. They were still holding each other and she feels Clarke lean her head against her shoulder. Before she realizes it Lexa is stroking her hair.  
"It's been a long day, let's get you home."  
"I mean it Lex, It's going to take time, I need to sort my things out and I need to understand how I can do this with the least collateral damage. But I want you. I don't Raven to check you out and tell me how pretty you are, I already know how pretty you are and it makes me jealous."  
"Ok." Lexa chuckles and puts their foreheads together. "Maybe one day we'll be together."  
"Shh none of that dramatic nonsense, we will be together. I'm just asking for a bit of time. That's all."   
She helps Clarke into her coat and waves goodbye to Raven. "So Raven thinks I'm pretty uh?"  
"Don't!"  
"Maybe I should give her a call?"  
"STOP IT."  
"You know you are in luck because there's this blonde I can't stop thinking about."  
"Really?" Clarke says turning towards her. Lexa smirks and it takes all of Clarke's might not to kiss her.   
Unfortunately she doesn't see the car passing by and someone throwing an object against the window of Raven's bar another to the sidewalk next to Lexa's feet. The rock has note attached to it but Lexa ordered everyone to stay back from the one inside telling them to leave the bar.   
Before she can read the note, Nevermore is up in flames.


	12. Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry, the last two weeks were crazy and this is just a small update to get me going. Thank you for reading.

Clarke had a large bruise over her forehead and was being taken care of in a ambulance. Lexa was asking the officers questions while the fire department extinguished the residual fire inside. Raven was on another ambulance because the explosion got most of her leg.  
Lexa watched from afar when Bellamy came, wearing a sharp suit and examining Clarke. Odd, from what she got from Bellamy's work he should be home hours ago, and not even her in the worst moments of her grief wore a suit to stay at home. To each its own.  
It's making her heart ache, to know that he is the one who will be comforting Clarke tonight, who will get to hold her if she gets nightmares. She didn't remember what longing felt like but now she was reminded of that and almost couldn't bear it.  
She walks towards Raven and she is in excruciating pain, for whatever reason the painkillers are taking forever to work. She volunteered to go with her in the ambulance although they've seen each other two times.  
"I texted Anya. She'll be at the hospital when we get there." Lexa said, trying to help Raven to focus on something else.  
"I don't... I don't want her to see me like this." Raven says wincing.  
"Don't be silly....there's more to Anya than that."  
"I don't want her to think I'm weak."  
"What?"  
"You heard me."  
"Seriously, my ears are still buzzing."

They close the ambulance doors and get moving, after Raven takes a breathe to deal with the bumpy ride, she repeats the phrase.  
"She cares about you Raven, she's serious. aren't you?"  
"Have you looked at her?"  
"Yes, I was her roommate for a while. I've seen all there is to see."  
"She's not shy is she?" Raven said smirking.  
"Nope."  
"She's an upcoming successful lawyer, what will she do with a cripple?"  
"Don't say that! Don't ever say that do you hear me? You wouldn't believe how much I wished Costia was still here, even with disability. I'd give anything to have her back, even a fraction of her. "  
"I'm..sorry I guess, I didn't remember. She told me about your girlfriend."  
"It's okay, just don't ruin it with your ego Reyes. Besides, chicks love scars."  
"Does Clarke love them?" Raven teases her.  
"She hasn't seen them yet." Lexa rolls her eyes.  
"You guys are too vanilla. Here I was thinking y'all were banging on any plain surface."  
"Sorry to disappoint."

"Seriously, Bellamy, they are just going to stitch this up." Clarke repeats for the thousand times but Bellamy is set on making a scene out of this.  
"But what if you have a concussion!!! They need to, at least, do you a ct scan?!"  
"No they don't, because I'm fine."  
"I'm fine, I'm fine...you sound like the black knight from Monty python and the Holy Graal. "It is but a scratch!" and his arm falls off." Octavia says making a phony english accent. "But she's right Bellamy it's a flesh wound, she'll be well asap. Clarke just needs some rest."  
It was too late though, Bellamy was already yelling at the doctor. The both of them watch the scene wishing someone will just ignore him.  
"Wierd that he still has his suit on." Octavia starts.  
"He told me he had a late bar meeting with his company."  
"Do you think architects think better in a bar?!" Octavia says raising an eyebrow.  
"What are implying Octavia, I'm tired and my head hurts."  
"I think he is cheating on you..."  
"Octavia!!"  
"Seriously, he is making a scene just to act like he is very offended but it's not because of you. It's him. Like those married dudes that cheat and then bring the wife gifts afterwards."  
"If he only knew what I would give for just some peace and quiet."  
"Doesn't it bother you that he is cheating?"  
"Octavia...you don't know that."  
The flustered Bellamy came to them huffing and puffing.  
"Baby, just calm down."  
"Calm down??? You could have died!"  
"But I didn't, go and see how Raven is okay, please?" Clarke says and he whispers something like good idea allowing Octavia and her to just sit quietly.  
"Do you wish Lexa was here instead?" Octavia asks.  
"Please, Octavia, not now" What was wrong with people doesn't she get a break after being involved in an explosion.  
"No, serious. Do you want me to text her?"  
"What is your deal? You keep pushing and shoving us together. Yes I want her here, she'd stay quiet and in her place and not annoy me until I'm ready to go home."  
"That's how you know. That you are meant to be with someone."  
"What?"  
"In your darkest hour? In SICKNESS and in health?"  
"Please, Octavia, you sound like we are going to get married in Vegas next weekend. Take a chill pill."  
"You, on the other hand, are chilling like a villain."  
"Seriously, just back off" Clarke yells with her eyes closed. She just wants to be alone. Was that so much to ask?

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come." It's not Octavia she hears next to her.  
"No, no Lexa. Please. Why is everything so damn hard today, maybe I should have that cat scan after all. Come here!"

She grabs Lexa's hand and asks her to sit again.  
"You were all I wanted with me tonight."  
"Maybe someday?"


End file.
